Do the ladies like F/M ?

One of the pleasures of submitting a story to the Library is reading any comments that it may attract. The stories that I send in are heavily weighted towards the F/M genre but the comments I receive tend to be from the gentleman members. This is largely explained by the balance of the membership but it I wonder if this is the whole story. How much do the ladies actually like spanking their gentlemen? Or at any rate reading about it.
I am too idle to compile the statistics to back up this impression but it appears that the comments tally for stories by such masters of the F/M persuasion such as Canadianspankee, Crimson Kid as well as those who include F/M in a wider catalogue, e.g. TFS, Smeple, Goodgulf and John Graves (apologies to those I have omitted) also seem to reveal a similar balance.
The same seems to apply to the creation of F/M, f/m stories where again the authors seem to be preponderantly male. Of course we do have marvellous stories penned by the ladies, Flopsy springs to mind as does Aunt Carla whose series Punished Peeping Tom is a personal favourite, whilst Elorac who has been overwhelmingly M/F in orientation has recently given us the delightfully strict Miss Simmons: but these are included in a body of work where normally it is the lady who is spanked.
Of course, I may be imagining all this but I do wonder if the ladies generally prefer to be lying across the knee rather than sitting down with the weight of another across their laps.

In my experience - which should in NO WAY be taken as a scientifically backed argument - female spankos overwhelmingly prefer to receive. However, "overwhelming" is not the same thing as "universal."

For instance, there are a lot of women who may prefer being on the receiving end, but are also happy to switch on occasion. These preferences are also reflected in the stories and comments they leave on the site; plenty of mostly M/F female writers and commenters will occasionally pen or read an F/M piece.

I've also known at least a few women who started out as pure spankees, then started to experiment with switching, and eventually came to see themselves as more top than bottom. In several of those cases, this happened concurrently with their discovery of latent bisexual tendencies, and/or of other kinks. This leads me to suspect that the general female preference for M/F is mostly down to socialization rather than biology, and that those who are more willing to experiment sexually in general are likely to discover some repressed topiness. I have a hunch that if men and women had the same upbringing and social pressures, they'd be evenly distributed across the top/bottom/switch spectrum, though of course I have no way of proving it.

Finally, and perhaps related to the previous point, female spankers are MUCH more common within the lesbian community. I don't know if that's because being non-heterosexual makes you less likely to feel limited by social conventions regarding sex and gender, or simply because there's just something innately more spankable about women (counterpoint to the latter hypothesis: M/M spanking is quite popular among gay men, and with some female readers). This isn't really relevant to your question about F/M, but I think its worth wondering why women who like to spank women seem more common than women who like to spank men.

Wow - This is a very interesting question to think about, and it opens up a whole Pandora's box of speculation regarding the nature of our kink, it's relation to sexuality, and the whole "nature vs nurture" debate about male/female sexuality, gender roles, and...the whole ball of wax. I suspect someone could get their PhD researching and waxing philosophical about it all. All I can say is, practically speaking, from what I've seen at spanking parties, the women are almost universally spankees (with the exception of a few "pros" who make their living as dominatrixes), and the men are mostly spankers - though not entirely; there are certainly many noteworthy exceptions. I would suggest that it's probably true that those who are more "free thinking" types, less bound by traditional social mores, seem to be a bit more likely to be switches (myself included), and willing to explore more sides of the coin, so to speak. It's also probably relevant to point out that the very nature of this kink is likely to some extent tradition-bound, relying on nostalgia for some of its appeal! Anyway, it's a complicated question with no obvious answer - not that there needs to be any obvious answer anyway, as long as we're all having fun! But it is fun to talk about...

The trend in my experience is that most female spankos like to be on the receiving end. I've known a fair amount of female switches too, but almost every one of them preferred taking spankings from men and giving spankings to women. I'm not too familiar with the F/M side of things and perhaps my not knowing women interested in it is a factor of me not having sought that style of encounter out.

As a writer who usually focuses on F/F as well as F/M stories, I find female spankers of much more interest than the male variety. Yes, I am bi and yes, I'm mostly dominant in my own life, although I occasionally feel the need to switch, but only wish to be spanked or dominated by another woman. I do not enjoy chains, metal or leather accoutrements but prefer the well-tailored female professional in a dominant role.

I have to agree that more ladies like the guys to do the spanking rather then vice versa. However at times I do wonder if the lady ever asked the guy doing the spanking if he would like to reverse things sometimes, how many guys would answer yes?

In general women prefer to think of their guy of strictly masculine and submitting to a spanking does not fit that image. A man taking charge and spanking his lady fits the image and thereby such is generally more accepted by women in general today.

So in thinking about this post, I have to write my own opinions. First, many men who may never admit it, would love their lady to spank them, but because of that image men feel vital to maintain, they will never ask or admit their desire. Second, in considering the same image, many women will never spank their man because if it got out the image of her having a masculine husband would be questioned and that could affect the relationship.

Many women would admit that men at times act like overgrown children. The saying goes 'men never outgrow their toys, the toys just get bigger, more expensive and more dangerous'. The never out growing their toys is a sign men still need their mothers around to instill common sense into them, but since mom and the wife feel it is not their place, things can go from bad to worse.

So my conclusion to this matter is this. As stats on this site will prove, the M/F story is preferred by most readers on this site. After that I would suggest F/F and F/M come in close together in second place. I think these stats also reflect real life and the three options would rank the same.

If I accept that image and perception are going to affect every person, then F/M will never be accepted by many people as it does not fit what is perceived by many as the norm. This is really too bad, because many women and guys are scared to mention it even if it has occurred to them to try it, and thus may be missing out on something they may find can be a great as M/F.

I know there as been a few stories here that have a perceived tough man going home and getting spanked by his wife. It can and does happen. It we (and I mean me too) would only quit worrying about what is the norm and get back to simply enjoying what we desire, the world and life would be a much better place.

My final statement here is that I hope no one ever stops actually practicing or even writing F/M just because of what others think. I hope many women read my stories and perhaps think about involving their men on occasion, but I recognize that may rarely happen.

There are different issues here, including whether we are talking about erotic or punishment spanking. I personally, have a thing about punishment, which males and females both need at some time and although I am predominantly M/F in every aspect, I enjoy either in a story, most especially if deserved, whether carried out by male or female. I would happily spank a man for punishment, and enjoy it immensely!
I agree that the macho male image may be PERCEIVED as being ruined if he is spanked by a woman. However, as is more obvious here at LSF than I would ever have imagined, F/M is craved by countless men who do not come over as weak.
Comments I received on my "Formidable Miss Simmons" stories suggest many men deliberately misbehave (as women also do) precisely in the hope of earning a spanking.
I read every single entry in the recent F/M challenge, liking some more than others and have never read so many of this orientation before, it was a different experience.
On the erotic side of the coin, I respond to M/F, but not F/M or F/F.
I agree this is an interesting point of discussion and will follow it with interest.

Thanks to Brodiejlb for raising the question. It was one I had intended asking myself at some stage. As a male, I find the thought of spanking another man's butt totally repulsive (sorry if this sounds homophobic), so I personally find it very difficult to imagine a woman actually wanting to spank a man's butt, although there is clearly plenty of women willing to do it (if only as part if a monetary transaction). I would love to know how many women actually fantasize about spanking a man and under what circumstances. For example, I found Elorac's distinction between punishment spankings and erotic spankings very interesting. Are the interests of women would-be spankers confined to a significant other, or (like most men) are they fairly promiscuous about who they would like to spank (at least in their imagination)? There are so many questions I would love to ask, so hopefully this thread will engender a large response.

Matching up the responses to their country of origin seems to indicate a greater inclination towards the enjoyment of F/M in the USA. I would have to add that things are very different even within the USA, but as a East Coast NYC/Philly metro person, I have to say that I know plenty of spanking women who spank for both fun and punishment and who don't receive a single dollar for it.

Going by the numbers, M/F certainly predominates, but as CS said, it's not universal. I have a lovely dominant lady in my life who happily spanks for fun and punishment, and have had others in the past, in addition to real life and online friends with the desire.

If you Google "The Disciplined Husbands Forum" you can read accounts from a slew of real people (men and women) in actual F/M-DD relationships. We do exist.

I was always a spanker with an interest in F/m but none of the women I met cared for it. Then one fine day I woman I had known for a while and had felt attracted to mentioned that she had recently spanked one of her teenage boys. She had raised three kids on her own and she said that she could not imagine doing it without spanking. So we got into a relationship and I guess I became her forth kid, she found spanking a way to handle my sometimes annoying behavior, but she also felt it improved my performance in bed. My point in this is that the spanking itself she did not find erotic, it was the results she liked. In the other F/m couples we met, and there were quite a few, this seemed to be common. Some woman liked giving a spanking for its own sake, but most liked it because of the way their man reacted to it. I don't know if I stated this very well so sorry if it makes no sense.