Words for 'bottom' - what do you prefer ?

I had the term arris explained to me by a Cockney when he referred to a girl as having a 'naughty arris' and we all wondered what he was talking about. He answered with 'arse' and we said that we understood frog and toad for road and bubble and squeak for Greek, but how did he get arse our of arris? His answer: 'Aristotle rhymes wiv bottle. Bottle an' glass rhymes wiv arse. Arris.'

And of course all Cockneys know that 'Arry Stottle used to run a jellied-eel stall in Covent Garden...!

I sort of enjoy the humorous circumlocutions that were so popular in the 30's, 40's and 50's like "getting to the bottom of this" or "taking care of the seat of the problem" or "right where you need it the most"because it just sounds so much more sophisticated. Using vulgar simple words just comes across as being vulgar or simple minded, like a sleazy unimaginative pornographer.

I think that using the word bottom rather than the, shall we say more cruder terms like arse, takes me back to childhood. As bottom is the term mostly used with children,especially getting thretaened with a smacked bottom for being naughty ! Perhaps I just want to regress to childhood spankings ?

It's a real problem, I tend to start with "bottom" but if you're describing a spanking of any length you tend to look for other words as variation. "Arse" is definitely too crude unless the story allows for this, "bum" is a bit childish, and once you start using "nates "and "globes" and suchlike it makes it sound like you're struggling for synonyms. I probably alternate with "rear" and "buttocks".

I must admit that hearing a female use the word bottom is a turn on for me especially if it's in well spoken English English. Even if a girl mentions something like the bottom of the page, it works for me.

I like the word 'bum'. It goes well with 'bare' and 'blistered' and 'bruised'. It also hints at shape and texture - soft, round, bouncy.

I remember reading the term smackbottom to describe a spanking (fairly mild) in Janus and took to using it in my own work. I'm also rather partial to the two words of smacked bottom, they just seem to go so well together.