Had my second spanking and have a concern

Hello all. Well I contacted the dominatrix that spanked me last month and we set up a session that we conducted last week. I had asked her about a week before the session if it would be possible to go a little more severe from last time,but that I was concerned about bleeding as I do have a job where I must sit for part of the day. The domm assured me she could increase without blood. The session was harder from the start,more intense a lot of hitting the same spot over and over,crease of leg/butt,that kind of thing. I forgot to mention that she laid some instruments out after my initial otk hairbrushing and ordered me to pick one. The domme knows I don't like leather floggers and stuff so I wasn't picking that so I go with a small hairbrush like paddle. She laughed and told she was happy I picked that as it was very painful. It was pretty painful and like I said it was coming in full force. I did yelp at times,but took it. The grand finale was me laying on a bench,beaten with a strap,cane and about thirty wacks with that small paddle. No mercy,same spots over and over. After 30 I asked for mercy and she laughed and said "oh gee your bleeding ". I wasn't mad at her but I did ask her and she said well I did it because I know you want to please me and this pleases me. I do like to please her but I am a little nervous going forward. She has asked if I would be willing to be tied down/secured for my next beat down,but I am worried of what I could be looking at after this last time of blowing off my concern. In truth the bleeding thing wasn't that bad and I could sit no problem. Maybe she knew that ? Or maybe she just wants to dominate me without concern. Any input would be appreciated .

"I know you want to please me and this pleases me."

Baloney! Outside of the fantasy of the role play, you are the customer in this relationship. Therefore you get to decide on your limits. She either respects your limits or you are in an unsafe situation.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OWwOJlOI1nU

I wouldn't continue with this woman, you had a very clear limit which she disregarded. The first rule of being a top is to respect and take care of your bottom, either she didn't respect your limits or she was going way harder than she has the experience to handle and broke skin by accident. If she was an amateur it would be an honest mistake but you went to this woman trusting her to have the experience required.

Actually, from the session you just described I'm not at all surprised that you were bleeding. That sounded like quite the session. I think the minute she saw you were starting to bleed she should have stopped allowed you to assess the situation, (severity of the bleeding) then make a decision as to what you wanted to do from there. I agree with the other comments, from my experience at doing this, it must be safety first for the bottom. As was mentioned, always respect limits, I always did. I wasn't a professional at this so I wasn't getting paid but I always felt responsible for the women who were on the bottom. I wanted them to come away fulfilled and satisfied within the limits that were discussed and set ahead of time.

I have absolutely no knowledge of this kind of thing personally, but it seems logical that there's only two reasons for someone to be restrained during a "session". One; if he requests it, for whatever reason that may be and two; for the dom/domme's personal reasons, which may include a desire to prevent the client from ending the session "prematurely" (due to discomfort, pain, panic, etc). This would seem to already raise concern in your case, due to past behavior of this woman. If she also wants to gag or somehow muffle you as well (which she could well do in any case if you're already restrained), that would, in my mind at least, raise a huge red flag.

Her comment that "I know you like to please me and this pleases me" also seems a cause for concern. This is supposed to be about you, not her. She's actually supposed to be pleasing you, not the other way round, as you're the one paying her, no?

If you're actually into this kind of thing (and it seems you are) it would seem to me that it's paramount that you find someone you can trust absolutely and, frankly, this doesn't seem to be the case with this woman. Continue with her at your own peril or find someone else. For what it's worth from someone who has no actual experience at this at least (but a highly developed sense of paranoia). Maybe it's just me...

Good luck in any case.

No blood means no blood whatsoever. It's either time for an honest assessment with this lady herself or out the door never to return, AFAIC. Let us know how it goes, please and yes, good luck.

It's time to move on and find someone else. You can not trust this woman nor is this a safe situation for you.

Janine and others are quite right. I have to agree this is not SAFE! Please find another domme, you will be glad you did. At the first sign of blood she should have quit spanking you right then on the spot. That was your wish. She also ignored your safe word. Under no circumstances would I allow her to tie me up nor any other pro or play session dominant.

Also, don't put yourself in a bound position of any kind you do not have the freedom to get out by yourself. While there is a sense of vulnerability whether tied or in hanging stocks at a club. The point is you don't have any control. Please be careful and safe while allowing the domme to top with in your agreed limits. Her failure to heed your safe word and brash comment about the blood are huge 'Red' flags. The bottom line is there has to be a commitment and relationship to trust. I hope this helps as we all need to be there for each other as we explore our needs.

Sane, safe, and consensual are the watch words.

If you didn't consent to bleed, then:
a) she doesn't know what she's doing - in a dangerous way, or
b) she deliberately ignored your limits.

If A, then she's a dangerous amateur passing herself off as a pro.

If B, then there's no difference between what happened and when a woman let's a man know that she's only consenting to certain acts, but that man then takes then further without consent because "he know what she really wants". She ignored the limits you set and can not be trusted to respect any limits you set in the future.

Zero experience with this sort of thing, but I think the number of questions you're asking indicates that you pretty much know it's a bad situation and you just need confirmation. I think the group consensus is RUN FROM THIS IDIOT!!!