Looking for help for a strange, weird dialect (twitter talk)

I'm writing a story about spanking happening at a modern institute, set in the modern world, and as I write it I'm reminded that I don't speak twitter. Nor do I do much texting, Is there any chance that someone who texts regularly could help me make some messages that sound like they are coming from first and second year university students?

The first one is a 20 year old girl (who lives at home) telling friends that her mother said she could spend two nights at the Harrington Institute. I've got the following series of tweets:
"EEP! OMG! OMG! My mom just sed that I cn spend 2 night at Harrington! Maybe more! OMG!"
"A van's coming 2 get m! NO JOKE OMG OMG!"
"They R HERE! OMG I hear them dstairs!"
"At door! OMG OMG O"
"This is Heather's mother. After talking about her in regards to last night, we decided together that she should spend a few days there exploring things. She agreed to be picke"
"Picked up by their outreach service and is now on her way there. Expect to hear from her when you hear from her. Or, in the alternative, some of you might be meeting her"
"Meeting her sooner than you expect. Why does this thing stop before I'm finished typing?"


Now I think I nailed that last bit (someone who doesn't understand twitter), but I don't know about the others.
Then there's:
"OMG! Mom sed since I'm posting I cn join them! OMG! OMG.!"
"OMG THEY'RE HERE!"

Later, someone taunts friends. She had a uniform from the institute, takes a selfie of herself wearing it and sends this message:
"Hey Jen. U kno those lrs wh went 2 HI? Got a uniform! L @ this! #YOLO #Harrington #NSFW"

And a final text:
"HELP! My aunt didn't pay the bill and they R cutting the net in 5 minutes. less now. No hot spots near, no minutes left, and over my data plan!"

So, can any social media savvy types help a dinosaur nail some dialogue? If so, thank you in advance.

Goodgulf

The writing style that has evolved because of the internet and twitter, facebook, etc, really annoys the crap out of me. It drives me up a wall to see "R U going 2 do it?" The worst part, for me, is to realize that 200 years from now that's how people are going to be writing things like formal court documents and grant proposals because that will be the accepted form of formal writing. Kids visiting the National Archives are going to be looking at the Declaration of Independence and be asking questions like, "Why did they bother to spell everything out?" and their teacher will have absolutely no idea. Kids will be wondering what font they used for it and thinking that the founding fathers printer was running out of ink.

I hate to tell you this, Goodgulf, but even we moms know how to text. While we might not use all the right lingo, I don't know of anyone who would be as wordy as you have this mom. The sheer act of two-finger typing on that little pseudo-keyboard would cure that pretty quickly. And, we would realize it had cut us off because it was out of space.
Just something to think about.

And me too! It's one thing communicating that way on a mobile phone but I'd pass on reading a story that's littered with text speak. Mega irritating!

Is everyone aware that they are not teaching handwriting (I think they call it script) in school any more. When my nephew told me that I couldn't believe it! They (at least the schools where I live) feel that people don't need to know how to write any more since texting, tweeting e-mail, etc. is now in our lives and it is outdated. As long as children can write their names that is all that is necessary. That doesn't apply to the above (which drives me crazy too), but how does everyone feel about that?

I agree, depending on how much of it there is.


They still teach it here in Alabama. The kids I babysit were just practicing their cursive letters a couple of weeks ago.

The only time I use text speak is when someone says, "Take care. Have a great day." etc... Then I simply type in U2. I do a lot of helping out on a writing group for young people interested in writing. The first thing I tell them is to stop using Internet lingo.

Yes, it's a terrible way to write.
Yes, adults text and tweet as well.

But what I'm looking for is to capture the patois of the young. To write it in such a way that the average 20 year old wouldn't say "that's someone else trying to sound like they know how we talk - and failing".

Getting that style of dialogue right can add to a story, but it's trick. For example, Kelly Armstrong (a fantasy writer who does some YA work) writes her "teen speak dialogue" after hanging out at food courts and listening to teens speak back and forth. I can't see myself searching for twitter feeds of college girls talking about being picked up from their houses by mysterious van... Even if those feeds exist I'd be nervous about the NSA monitoring my search (and my life after I search for that).

If no one wants to help translate then I'll go with what I have.

Thanks for your time,
Goodgulf

There have been a couple of book releases over the past few years where classics have been rewritten using text speak. It's fairly amusing, but I really hope it doesn't come to pass overall. It was annoying enough when Prince wrote his songs with titles like that.

Be assured that, whatever the 'right way' is today, the 20-year-old reading the story in 5 years will find it archaic (and maybe sooner).