Are Male Spankiees Less of a Man?

This is a good discussion and it's been very interesting reading the comments.
Back to the question. Are Male Spankiees Less of a Man?
Many would say yes, including some in the community, unfortunately, but I would disagree. It's not for everyone, nor is a woman submitting any less of a woman. Submitting is a choice that actually takes some guts. The first time I volunteered I was apprehensive, even though my mind knew the lady I was with would do no lasting damage intentionally... Years later she became wife #2. Spankings resumed.

Whilst there are no doubt men who desire to live permanently under a dominant female and be punished by them, I suspect they are most likely a tiny minority. For most men who enjoy being spanked by a matriarch it is no more than a temporary escapist fantasy that probably has its roots in their childhood.

Apparently most men who visit a Pro Dom are wealthy and successful people and dominant themselves in workplace.

To say a man who likes being spanked is less of a man is like saying an actor playing a baddie must be a baddie. Often the actors who make the best baddies are the nicest people in real life and vice versa.

Wow, "tiny minority"? What are you basing that on? All I can say is that we certainly don't travel in the same circles at all.

I live under my dominant wife´s authority - and she doesn´t even spank me!

I have met a few hen pecked hubbies over the years but I have actually never encountered a relationship where the guy is totally subservient to his wife. All the fellow spankos I have known have all spanked as a bedroom game and not as a lifestyle.

I suppose if you have a taste for real full-time subjugation and search out others like you, then you will find them, but I still think they are a tiny minority.

Brosse6

Correct me if I'm wrong, but you seem to be saying some male spankees are more okay than others. I think it would be much better if we could answer the OP's question with an unequivocal No!

I don't think it is a matter of being OK or not OK Alan. Men take on the role of spankee for various reasons.

There are those who do so for temporary escapism when in the real world they are successful and assertive or indeed regular guys, often in high pressure jobs, and I suspect they are the majority. These men are also topping from the bottom as they enter this willingly and can revert at any time they wish. Clearly there can be no loss of manliness there.

However for a man to abdicate all responsibility and authority as a lifestyle to another (male or female) to become a full time slave or child has indeed negated their manliness. I also believe that such men are a tiny minority.

Oh for the love of...


Do you think that more than a tiny minority of women would actually enjoy a 24/7 D/s relationship for long? Even within the demographic of women who like being spanked, I doubt more than a fraction would want permanent fulltime submission.

So, when you say that you doubt more than a tiny minority of men would want it either, well...no shit, Sherlock?


How many people do you think can afford to regularly hire a pro domme?

Wealthy and successful people are more able to do this. It may be entirely selection bias that makes them seem more likely to have such desires than poorer folks.


So a man who likes being spanked is pretending to not be a man? Lol.

SNM

To be perfectly frank I am not even sure what your rant is actually about?

Hmmmm, a lot to dissect here, and in your other comment. To your first point on your experience and consequent belief in numbers of sub men, the writer in me can't help but think of a dialog: I encounter an American from rural Kansas who insists that since he has never met any Frenchmen, that they must not exist or if they do only in very small numbers. "Well just go to France, and you'll find plenty," I tell him. To which he replies, "well, yeah, I suppose if you want to find Frenchmen and go looking for them, you might find some........but I doubt they'd be in any great number." LOL

"Full time subjugation" is a very telling way of describing what others would call "a loving Female Led Disciplinary relationship". So tell me, do you feel the same about a submissive wife in a disciplinary relationship? Or is she just doing what a female should do?

Then there's this gem: "There are those who do so for temporary escapism when in the real world they are successful and assertive or indeed regular guys, often in high pressure jobs, and I suspect they are the majority. These men are also topping from the bottom as they enter this willingly and can revert at any time they wish. Clearly there can be no loss of manliness there.

However for a man to abdicate all responsibility and authority as a lifestyle to another (male or female) to become a full time slave or child has indeed negated their manliness."

You speak like an expert when to anyone with experience you sound like you are just pulling shit out of your ass. You say a guy can take on a submissive role, but if he only does it occasionally there is no loss of manliness? What if he wears a frilly skirt when he's being spanked? Is the situation negated just because it's occasional? By that logic someone who only murders people on alternate weekends is not really a serial killer because he doesn't do it 24/7. That would be a great court defense: "Your Honor, my client has been in this courtroom all week and hasn't killed anyone......."

Next, full time FLR/DD does not mean an abdication of all responsibility. Nor is such a relationship that of a slave or child. (Where are you getting this stuff?) But what if it was? I agree that it is certainly "unmanly" to be into submissive age-regression, but by that logic, so is the part-time spanking client with the high-pressure job.....unless he's paying to DO the spanking. Being the one over a lap is "clearly" not "manly" by any standard. And I tend to think your assertion that it is, is your own rationalization for one kink over another. But while I agree as I said in my own post that such behavior is indeed "unmanly" by traditional standards, neither necessitate being "less of a man" in more significant ways.

Being a man is not measured solely by what one does in the bedroom. So an asshole-type alpha, while very macho in appearance, is not really much of a man if he acts like a bully, nor is a kinky executive-type who spends his kids' tuition money on Pro Dommes. One might appear more "manly" than the other, but neither is a man if integrity, honor, and other attributes, are the measuring stick.

But I do appreciate that you wrote what you did, because you did provide a very nice example of the attitudes out there. If anyone thought that such a view would never be seen in 2020 on a forum devoted to spanking, you have shown them they were wrong. Prejudices among the kinky are unfortunately just as prevalent as comparative skin tone among people of color. It's all a matter of "I am kinky in my own way and expect to be respected......but what YOU DO is weird and wrong." Also, I suggest that if you are going to pontificate on the world of kinky behavior, that you get out a bit more.