Off topic rant

Old age is a very dangerous time of life for lots of reasons, unfortunately. Abuse can come from lots of directions. A trusted loving nearby relative with power of attorney provides considerable protection. I had a grandmother seriously beaten up in a nursing home, hastening her death, when I was a child, and it still bothers my thoughts today.

@dougmorton: That's another thing that occurs far too often. If anyone has relatives in a nursing home, make sure you check on them frequently.

If you know her friends why not have your own low-key memorial get-together without the vultures?

Yes, it sucks what her family did to her. I don't know about other states, but our Ombudsman's office will investigate anonymous complaints if you suspect abuse is happening.