Are you out, or are you closeted?

Hmm, probably more like 5/6 women that you have dated have been into it, because that's the type of woman you are attracted to, and who are attracted to you. I believe you, but your own sample is by definition a skewed sample. (I mean, 6/6 men I've dated have done it to me, but 0/6 men my uptight friend has dated have done it to her...)

If you were to survey a representative sample of women, I HIGHLY doubt you would find 5/6 of them would be willing to go over any man's knee. (Anecdotally, if I were to ask every woman I know if they are into playful spanking, and if they answered honestly, I'm guessing maybe 1/10 might say yes.)

So you're finding the right women for you But they're not the norm

When I was outed, my wife went around asking her friends whether they or their husbands were into spanking, and predictably she drew a big fat zero. However they were overwhelmingly women like her, which was why they were her friends - none of them were promiscuous or, I'd guess, had a variety of sexual experience.

But I'm convinced that both Patron and Burgundy are at least half right - I find modern women are actually MORE sexually adventurous then men and certainly less prudish but have to think carefully to whom they can reveal that side. And they always have to be mindful of sexual predators or abusers - maybe it doesn't manifest itself here on the LSF or BottomLines, but in a free-for-all forum for kinksters some VERY disturbed men come to the fore.

You were outed against your will?? You poor thing That's a nightmare... For me at least, along with the standards, you know, showing up naked to a school examination, and being chased by bears while running through molasses.

How did you get outed? And WHY one EARTH would your wife tell all her friends???

I am almost 100% in the closet. I may make a few remarks here or there that a spanko might pick up on, but my interests are purely private, not public, no clubs and nothing public that is obvious.

I'm almost 100% in the closet. My vanilla wife knows about my spanking interest and submit to seldom, very mild spankings. I have met a couple of other spankos to discuss with whom I've had very interesting talks; but I haven't played outside my marriage.

Even with spankos, it's not a guarantee that they'll be into hard spankings. I've talked to a couple of women who said they "love" to get spankings, and then they add "but I don't want it to hurt!" Eh??!

I can see I was rather unprecise: I'm only into mild spankings mostly with hand and never with heavy or "scary" instrument. What I could wish is a little feedback and joining the game from my wife. However I do understand how difficult it is as she's not into it at all. And maybe a little harder smack

Nah, you weren't - I assumed too much.

I do not bring up the subject unless I know the woman quite well. I once admitted some experience to a woman I had just met and she expected to start playing in an hour or so. :O

I'm about 80% out of the closet with my kink. My social circle is fairly liberated when it comes to sex so the people I live with know and I don't hide it. Every woman I sleep with knows ahead of time and 90% of the time they're game. Thankfully in the pagan communities I run in I'm fairly normal so what ever shame I had when I was younger is gone. Even a few of my co-workers know I'm a kinky bastard, I work in a salon so its not uncommon to hear about each others sex lives.