Some of the advice I've read on how to write has been totally ridiculous. One writer's advice included:
"You must carry with you at all times [i] three notebooks with pens of different colours - one for writing down overheard dialogue, one for descriptions of places and things, and one for your own ideas" (This also included the command that you spend your day following people to eavesdrop on their conversations)
"You [i]must spend at least two hours each morning and each afternoon at your desk, typing - whether you can think of anything to write about or not" (And, presumably, whatever your employer thinks about you taking four hours off from each day's work)
"At the end of each day, discard 90% of everything you've written, and condense the ideas in the rest onto one sheet of paper. At the end of each week read over the condensed sheets, and condense them" (This must get pretty complicated when you reach the stage of trying to condense one week's musical horror oriental western thriller sonnet comedy serial with the following week's gritty romantic historical sci-fi mystery warfare literary three-volume haiku)
And his final piece of advice, after the would-be writer has (presumably) lost his job, spent his life savings, ruined his sanity and been served with a selection of restraining orders? "First books never sell" |