In need of inspiration..... and spanking!

I took a Google picture search for "muses" and found it a bit difficult to relate to what I found. I suppose wrinkled, greying, male muses with a few(!) pounds too much are somewhere down at the bottom of page three?

Literary inspiration, and shedding of a bad habit or 2 or 3 (especially in keeping me focused on my writing hehe) is what I seek tho!!! Grey hair and a few extra pounds does't matter in my equation for the perfect muse... !:-P!

I'd love to volunteer for the role, Jools - but alas, the distance between GB and NZ makes regular spankings slightly impracticable....

Thank heavens for the internet! Any degree of muse-ship would be most appreciated!

Hope he makes you laugh. We all need amusement from time to time

(At least any need to be funny would rule me out!)

Yes a muse should definitely be a-musing!

I don't think you need a muse Jools, you are an intelligent woman and you will write when the mood takes you and you have an idea. I sometimes think that the more people think about such things the harder is becomes. Have faith in yourself

Jools,
Let's try this: make a list of 3- 5 things that you absolutely adore- these items really get your engine humming. You would avoid cancelling any interaction or experience you are expecting at any cost- almost. They can be places, certain character traits, a pleasant memory you look forward to reliving. It can be anything that makes your heart sing.

Now repeat this list of 3-5 things that you absolutely despise- their are no rules- but you must find these things absolutely despicable. Perhaps their existence make you furious... maybe you want to destroy it.

Do it one more time for things, objects, events... it could be whatever you fear or a common fear that appeals to you. Examine your list and construct a plot. start with a beginning, middle and end. Let it cook for a day or so while you let your characters, setting, and conflict speak to you.
Before you begin this process, relax and open your mind.
Islandcarol

According to the Oxford Dictionary, a muse is a woman, or a force personified as a woman, who is the source of inspiration for a creative artist. I don't think that is what you had in mind.

According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, a muse is a source of inspiration; especially : a guiding genius. I don't think you need a guiding genius either. The problem with guiding geniuses is that they can guide you right off your own path.

What you need, like PinkAngel said, is to have faith in yourself and your own talent and not depend on another person. That gives them WAY too much power over you. You need support, and you have an abundance of it here. Just relax, read, daydream, and let your writing take care of itself. You WILL become inspired. Don't try too hard and don't over-think it.

Thanks to you all for the excellent advice. Your affirmative suggestions are much appreciated. IC, what an informatively revealing process, I must use that! thank you!