Sex!

ordalie
Arrested Development?

i had a friend who used to refer to a woman's thingamajig as a thingamajig. let me put my _____ into your thingamajig is my vote.

I think THAT one is enough to make anyone wanna refrain from that dessert for life!! Ewwww molasses!!!

Is that is a euphemism for sex??? It sounds more like a euphemism for STDs. Again ewwwww!!!!!

Private Eye referred to it as Ugandan discussions after a Minister of Idi Amin was caught having sex at an airport lavatory. I must say that being a person of refined sensibilities I much prefer English euphemisms such as horizontal jogging or even hanky panky to those phrases we have imported from overseas such as hiding the salami or rocking the casbah. Not that one could ever approve of fornication whatever you may choose to call it!!

We happened to be discussing a similar topic here on the forums a few years back, which led me to do some internet research at the time. The result was a tongue-in-cheek story posted here called, "Talk Dirty To Me" (sorry for the self-plug, but I couldn't help myself!)

Some of the more memorable euphemisms I found:
Get a beef injection
Sink the sausage
Bury the hatchet where it won't rust
Pound the duck
Bump nasties
Have a go at the creamstick
Glaze the donut

And my favorite line (get ready--it's awful):
"And I knew he was aroused as well, his swizzle stick becoming stiff-and-stout underneath my downy cave."

Don't even get me started on the spanking euphemisms I used! LOL

Oh yes, hanky panky is undeniably British fun! (As is, 'Fancy a bit of how's your father?') I don't know where "Jiggi Jig" originated, but it does sound entertaining!

Dropping the anchor
Plowing the fields
and don't forget the "Christian Grey popsicle"

As I thrust my throbbing serpent deep into ..... somebody will have to finish the rest. Sorry, thats all I remember.

I was always partial to "making the beast with two backs", especially given the limits on speech, even artistic speech during the Elizabethan era.

I also second Seegee's idea of a Bulwer-Lytton contest. I wonder what the creative minds on this site might come up with. We could even divide it into categories, e.g., funniest, most evocative, grossest, etc. Might make an excellent subject for a Story Challenge too...

Of course, when it comes to slap-and-tickle, I'm sure the members here could come up with just as many, if not more euphemisms for spanking as for sex - I can think of 'a trip to the woodshed', 'left sitting on a five-barred gate', 'being made to wear the Lochgelly tartan' or even 'getting her apple polished' just off the top of my head...!