Authoress...

...
Wha --?
What did I do?

I think he's referring to your use of the term 'authoress,' though I could be wrong (it has happened once before).

Ah. Thank you, Rick. It's inconceivable that you could err twice in your illustrious career as Mr Right, so you must be.
But does this mean that we must refer to the newly-wed spouse of William, Duke of Cambridge, as 'Duch'?
Or to she who sews the leather patches onto the elbows of our trusty tweed jackets as 'Seamster'?
Or, indeed, that we must now refer to that steady staple of our fiction, the strict feminine instructress, simply as 'Govern'?
(Oh dear - I did it again, didn't I?)
Carol, author, I beg your indulgence: I am writing a tale steeped in Victoriana at present, and I fear it is more than my style that has regressed.
I remain, madam, your humble etc
TEM

Don't you mean regred?

Well, quite!
I must conf that I had thought our language a bling, a source of much happin, something to car. But unl this trend to make a m of it is redred, and urgently, then how we are to progr is anybody's gu. L and l are ideas addred; more and more, we are urged simply to dr to impr. I tell you, it's depring.

Does anyone have a clue why TEM is writing such gibberish?

School likely just got out so you cannot blame TEM for such stuff, he clearly is putting stronger stuff in his Earl Gray tea then when he had classes. Who would blame the poor guy, after months of having to put up with schools kids it is "depring".

If TEM were female, would she be an TheEnglishMasteriss? Inquiring minds want to know.

He would be The English Mistress of course. Funny, I have never thought of Rick as being Mr Right before!

PS TEM, I am sure jimisim was just having a joke. I expect Miss Thrashbottom will let you off with a severe telling off!!

Since when has Miss Thrashbottom let anyone off with a severe talking to? It would ruin her reputation and give TEM false hope