Are you out, or are you closeted?

Glagla
Just one at a time, lol. None right now.

Out to those who know basically or who find out, it not something i broadcast to all and sundry, but that because i am private type person in all areas of my life.

However it not something i would now hide, it is part of me, and part of my relationship.

When i entered my relationship which made me feel 'safe', my partner told me a quote which i hold dear it being:
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."
That is rather a broad statement and not one that fits all, as i was advised by a member of LSF when it involved 'coming out' to close family members, but i must admit it worked for me.

Different strokes for different folks one could say

That feels like it could be the inspiration for a story...

The good author gets their inspiration from a variety of sources, so a phrase off a posting on LSF fits that bill, i shall put inspiring on my CV, just may not say regarding what subject

deeply closeted

You are blessed with a wise partner. Though the cleverness of the construction may incline us to dismiss it as glib, it is for me an important life lesson I wish I'd had the courage to follow more often.

The construction reminds me of a similar adage: 'Not all that counts can be counted, and not all that can be counted counts" which is not dissimilar to another saying (with apologies to those who abide by a pork prohibition): 'Weighing the pig doesn't fatten it."

I've spanked a lot of my vanilla girlfriends, and done so in front of some friends. I have a few friends who I've gotten into spanking, but I still have a lot of trouble talking about it. I've recently started to reach out more to spankos, as I'm at the point where I'd like to have a group of associates that I can talk to about it.

I am indeed truly blessed, more than any words can express.

Quotes and phrases for me in recent times have become a succinct way of remembering and reinforcing valued life messages.

Such phrases/quotes can appear glib, however as i have learned ingrained in our history are motivational quotes that leaders like Churchill said which are still remembered to this day, so despite me not wanting to "Fight them on the beaches......." , i have learned the value of quotes, and see/use them as a tool in my toolkit in managing this old thing called life.

Thank you by the way for introducing me to two new quotations, so i must not count my pigs before they are hatched

Maybe they weren't into spanking, but they must have been exhibitionists, and it must have outweighed the I'm-not-into-spanking factor. I mean, vanillas just don't do that...

Burgundy

I find that, among the spanking community, this is a great misconception. Now I have a dominant personality in general, but even accounting for that, I'd say that about 5/6 women are into at *least* playful spanking. So we think of things in terms of "Vanilla world" and the alternate "Spanko world." What I find is that people in the spanko world underestimate how much the two worlds overlap.

Before proceeding it must be understood that if you announce spanking as a fetish, you're forcing the two worlds to collide. Words are the enemy of a good vanilla/spanko crossover situation.

Since we all know about the spanko world, here are the elements of the vanilla world that I've used to tell if I had a "vanilla spanko" on my hands.
Can I establish a general authority? Can I playfully chastise her? How does she react to this? Can I touch her while chastising? Can I cheat and threaten to tickle? Can I swat her lightly with an object? Maybe I can pick her up and squeeze her or carry her as fun punishment: "I'm not putting you down until you apologize. I don't care, I can carry you all day. Let me know when you want to walk on your own two feet again."

I could write a book on this. Even when I say "words are the enemy", I just mean the obvious descriptive words. If you keep the words fun and active, they can help greatly. "We have a troublemaker here." "I've got my hands full with you."

Like any good relationship, it's all about listening and paying attention to your partner. Women in general are up for a lot of things if presented properly, and I'm talking about a sample size that crosses age, culture and ethnicity. If a woman allows you to swat or even pinch her backside in a chastising way, you can at the very least establish a light disciplinary spanking relationship with her. There was a point in my life where about 75% of the non-relative women I knew had been over my knee and only one of them was a spanko.