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What's mild? What's severe?

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stevenr
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USA
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#51 | Posted: 29 Jul 2017 19:40
andromena

Well written, you said much of what I wanted to, but at the moment couldn't find the words to without sounding condescending.

I am nearly 60, I was spanked as a child, I was paddled in school, my dad did use a belt on me from time to time. I did not consider this abusive. It was considered how children were raised at that time. In all my years of public school, I had two teachers who were "abusive", one was plain mean, the other was going through some trauma of a marriage breaking up, I learned this later, as an adult when I ran across this teacher and she begged for my forgiveness.

As an adult, I've learned, discipline, even stern discipline done out of love, can be a very good, very beneficial thing. Discipline done out of meanness, seldom leads to anything good.

BrigittaCoral
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USA
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#52 | Posted: 31 Jul 2017 00:38
It's dangerous to start a discussion about spanking children. Emotions can run high and people have very widely differing opinions that can strike at the heart of who we are and the choices we made on how to raise our children. So with respect for the differing experiences other posters have, and with respect for their willingness to express it and share it, I present a different experience.

I was spanked a lot as a child and as an adult and can only say the two are completely different things. Getting spanked as a child taught me to distrust authority, to lie, to hide things and to believe that there was something fundamentally wrong with me. It was nothing but traumatic and never taught me to behave well. I was spanked until I was 19 when I finally threatened to hit back if I were hit again. I don't think I could have done so, but they stopped after that.

As parents, my husband and I chose not to spank. We believed strongly in discipline, but not in spanking. We raised a son who is respectful, polite and kind. He never got in trouble, is honest, doesn't drink or smoke and the few times he's tried weed, he talked to me about it. (He is 19.) We taught him respect by treating him with respect--modeling the behavior we wanted him to show.

I volunteer with teenagers. Never once have I ever wanted to strike or spank any of them. Even typing that makes my stomach turn.

There is a wealth of empirical evidence that says spanking children causes a multitude of problems and only anecdotal evidence that it can be positive and effective.

That said, I respect the choices other parents make and know they do it out of wanting what is best for their child.

As for the severity of adult spankings, that really does depend on the couple involved. I happen to have a high pain tolerance, so the spankings I like may sometimes sound more severe than how I experience them. I try to keep that in mind when I'm writing and most of the time I write things that are less severe than what I like outside my stories.

I think an interesting question is what sort of implements are considered more severe than others. In my experience, I can take a long strapping with very little noise or squirming, but a hairbrush? My husband always said I liked the idea of a hairbrush spanking more than the reality 'cause I could never hold still for it and was immediately yelping and trying to escape. So, for me, a hairbrush is more severe than a belt, but when I read others? It doesn't seem like others have that experience. And a switch? My husband gave me a single stroke with a switch over my jeans and it stung for days afterward--perhaps it was the type of switch (a long, thin one that had been soaked in water) and the way he used it, but it surprises me when I read about switchings, 'cause it makes me think they must be different from what I experienced. Likewise a ping pong paddle or a leather six-inch paddle is a relatively mild instrument that are perfect for really long spankings.

What is your experience with implements and severity?

ckpollman
Male Member

USA
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#53 | Posted: 17 Aug 2017 21:39
You may in your story spank or beat a slave, a child, a wife, a student or a prisoner until the blood flows from their ass and they pass out. I will not read the story. When "spanking" becomes close to torture and or includes abject humiliation as in "beaten in public with legs spread" I am out of here.
Consensual adult play has lots of variations and a hard spanking that elicits tears is ok. A red bottom or one with red lines is ok to. There is a psychological factor to include in the punishment/spanking story.

A twenty something thief, a middle aged socialite gossip, a lawyer than has stolen, a house wife who has disrespected her husband, a Senator - let's see them cry, plead and promise to repent as they kick and sob over the knee of an authority figure who in tanning their butt. This is fine and what I want to read stories about.

Please no terrified children, torture or beatings.

blimp
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England
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#54 | Posted: 18 Aug 2017 15:22
When I was twenty nine I had a relationship with a woman who was eleven years younger. I felt it would be ridiculous if I tried to get her to either spank or cane me so instead I ended up playing the dominant role. I have always been much more inclined towards masochism than being the dominant partner so to some extent I found myself in a false position. In the early days of our relationship I discovered she adored being spanked so it was no trouble at all to persuade her to accept a caning. She took to it like a duck to water! There were few things she liked more than a good hard six of the best. Not like in those awful Russian/Czech videos where the womans backside looks like a side of raw beef afterwards but still a proper good hiding. Usually after a bit of role play it was six across either a tight pair of shorts or navy blue knickers. What impressed me more than even her acting ability was the fact that she wouldn't move a muscle or make a sound whilst I was vigorously whacking her bum.

The only time she ever gave me a hint that it was painful was after one session where I had without success tried to get at least one howl or grimace from her. I suggested that she might like an extra six of the best to accompany the six hard strokes I had already awarded her. No thank you she said.

I know for certain that I should have made a good deal more fuss if I had been on the receiving end. I think what is mild to one person would be severe to someone else. It depends on your expectations and your ability to absorb pain.

lvancisic1
Female Author

USA
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#55 | Posted: 10 Sep 2017 15:39
I agree with you Leslie. It is the ceremonial aspects and a girl's tears and feelings of shame that I find most pleasurable. I enjoy detailed descriptions of the raising of dresses and the lowering of panties

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