Room 101 - Pet Hates

blimp
Alef
Just you two wait...

Come find us! We are down here in Room 101...

Haha, nice try... *waves and shuts the door*

At Mumkeep Abbey, a trappist monastery in the north of England, there was a tradition whereby every four years, on Christmas day, despite the normal vow of silence, one of the monks was allowed to make a short statement.

On Christmas Day 1962, it was Brother Michael's turn. At the close of their modest Christmas dinner in the Refectory, he stood up and announced: "The porridge in this monastery is too salty!"

After a further four years of complete silence in the community, it was Brother Andrew's turn. As his fellows sat digesting their turkey, he cleared his throat and stated: "The porridge in this monastery is not salty enough!"

On Christmas day 1970, four years after Brother Andrew had spoken, Brother Peter stood up. With barely suppressed indignation, and to the consternation of everyone present, he declared: "I am leaving the monastery!"

The Abbot was so shocked at this that he broke his 40-year silence to ask: "But Brother Peter, why? Why would you even consider such an irrevocable step?"

His face contorted with the struggle to maintain his dignity, Brother Peter burst out: "I can't stand all this squabbling about porridge!"

Pet hates: ticking clocks, noisy eaters, gum chewers, headphone noises, trendy Americanisms, prudes, the nouveau riche. I'm quite easy going, really.

Not getting enough napkins at the restaurant table. They give them out as if they were gold.

I heard this tale a different way:

At Mumkeep Abbey, all the monks took a vow of silence, but were allowed to say two words to the Abbot each year. Brother Theodore joined the monastery one year ago. He approaches the Abbot on his one year anniversary, and says:

"Food bad."

The Abbot nods, and Brother Theodore goes back to his room.

Another year goes by, and Brother Theodore is again allowed to say two words. On his two year anniversary, he approaches the Abbot and says:

"Bed hard."

The Abbot nods, and Brother Theodore goes back to his room.

Another year goes by, so Brother Theodore is again allowed to say 2 words. On his third anniversary, he approaches the Abbot and says:

"I'm leaving."

The Abbot nods, and replies:

"Well, you might as well. You've done nothing but complain since you got here."

TheEnglishMaster

Haha love it

Another of my pet hates is seeing children dressed as mini versions of their parents. The Beckhams spring to mind. Let the kids be kids, not clothes horses.
There, that feels better. Now where did I leave my pipe and slippers. LOL

Oh gosh me too then, if one were to put KLSF Party at the Spanker Inn in that category!

Hmm who would I want to send to room 101.... annoyingly attention seeking individuals, fakers and trolls in general. Hmm people who don't comment on my stories... or don't comment in general... people who complain about commenting... oh dear this list is getting rather long so I had better stop here in fear of getting sent there myself hehe